"Literary authors are jealous of genre authors, because genre authors can write literary fiction whereas literary authors can't write genre..."
To help those of us who aspire to having a steely-eyed hero, or ample-bodiced heroine, insinuate themselves into the top of the "rip-roaring blockbuster" charts, CK Conception is pleased to offer up the "Literary Fiction Detector".
Inspired by Lee Child, whose recent comments implied that the quality of authors' output was in some way linked to their ability to shun 'big words', this tool seeks to cast the light of SCIENCE on your art by analysing it's readability and verbiositudiousnessity.
"We can all use big words, but we choose not to."
Lee Child, "The Books We Really Read" BBC2 World Book Night 5th March 2011
Enough of such periphrastic circumelocution!
Simply paste an example of your work into the form below and, on submission, linguistically-trained homonculi will examine the piece for excessively long words, lack of explosions, derth of heaving bosoms and so on. Hopefully the resulting feedback will help to steer you away from the slough of 'literary' despond and towards the unassailable summit that is 'genre'.
© 2011 CK-Conception & Charlie King.
PHP Text analysis tools from Dave Child (no relation, I hope!) http://www.addedbytes.com/lab/readability-score/, treated with far less respect than they deserve. Sorry. Smashing graphing functions from pChart.